Passionate ambivalence: hosting Sue Heilbronner on Never Ask for the Sale

I’m still buzzing a little from hosting Sue Heilbronner for a talk about her new book, Never Ask for the Sale. My product book club plus some founders crowded into my living room for the evening.

On the surface, this is a book about sales and how to close a deal. The central concept is using “passionate ambivalence” to sell: showing up energized and excited about a project or client relationship, while at the same time remaining calm and unattached to whether a particular deal or engagement happens.

This approach deeply resonates with me. I have a lot of “ick” when it comes to the hard sell, and this approach is more subtle.

But the book goes much deeper than how to sell. Sue focuses on mindset throughout, and discusses limiting beliefs and upper limit thoughts, which are barriers to how we show up in the world and how we do our best work.

During the book discussion, Sue had us each present a 30-second bio. She challenged us to identify and tell our most compelling version of what we do best, and to really distill our essence. This required a real willingness to go deep and get uncomfortable.

Sending my heartfelt thanks to this group that was willing to show up and get vulnerable: Greg Pfeil, Jon Bates, Sara Bates, Kate Catlin, Rachel Vecchitto, Katie Dunn, Jenn Dearth, and Kaley Klemp (not pictured, unfortunately).

And to Sue, for the fantastic book and for bringing this to my living room.